@cyberia shared a tweet of a French woman who whips out a tape measure when people get too close to her in public, and I'm mostly just mad I didn't think of that first. But I do have one in my purse now. If you hear of a person in France being assaulted for overzealous tape measuring brandishment, it might be me (typed as I'm waiting to see my doctor to have my WFH request extended).
Hey there. Heard there's probably going to be another big protest tomorrow. Remember:
- Remove batteries from your phone or leave them at home
- Wear full face masks
- Don't wear unique/identifying clothing (generic clothes from a chain store is a good idea)
- Plead the 5th amendment if arrested
- You have a right to a lawyer, don't talk to pigs without one. They aren't your friend, they aren't here to help you.
- Don't drive there if possible (license plate scanning)
- All Cops Are Bastards
- dense academic tone is hard to parse
- no poetic structure, text is unwiedly to distribute and read
- labor practices as described are largely outdated in a modern service-based economy
- long and boring
Dolly Parton's "9 to 5"
- adopts the conventions of the working class, immediately resonates with intended audience
- simple to memorize, material can easily be spread via oral tradition
- updated grievances are relatable to the average service worker
- an absolute banger
So, I've been eligible for French citizenship for a while. When I first became eligible, I took the required series of French tests to prove my proficiency in listening and speaking. Got my fingerprints done to send them off to the fbi (to prove I'm not a wanted criminal in my previous country of residence), did almost everything... then I got to the part where they vaguely require to prove the legitimacy of your relationship with a French citizen... and my motivation petered out. I was annoyed by the total vagueness of that bullshit. I just left my paperwork in a pile, telling myself I'd get back to it.
Well, now I need to get on it, for various personal reasons, and I now just found out the tests I took are no longer considered valid, because they have since added a reading comprehension and writing portion, so all non-citizens have to have done all four parts.
I realize this is maaaaaaajor first world problems. But I'm just so mad at myself right now. I'm generally not a procrastinator, but the very fact of trying to prove the legitimacy of my relationship with someone just pisses me the fuck off on principle. But I basically cut off my nose to spite my face. Which is fucking idiotic.
Anyway, this is a reminder to myself that no matter what bullshit it is, I need to get this the fuck done. No more procrastinating, kumquat. I'm counting on you.
And I've already sent in my papers (yes I had to sign up by mail and send a check to pay for my test 😂). New test is on November 17th.
DO NOT PUT THIS OFF ANY FURTHER, KUMQUAT, YOU PROCRASTINATING DUMMY.
Everything I put in here sounds braggy or label-shouty, so I'm just going to write nothing. TAKE THAT, PEOPLE AND BOTS OF MASTODON!!!!
masto instance for the tildeverse