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if your posts are bad on purpose you can call it lo-fi

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THIS is MY profile, if you're OFFENDED by something i SAY, i am SORRY and will DELETE it IMMEDIATELY

homer: wife, i desire to see the neighbour take his last breath. shall i go to confession

marge: homer. have you checked with the boy to see if returning flanders to our lord is not in fact a just and righteous deed

homer: boy. what say you

bart: a truth for a skateboard! a truth for a skateboard! a truth for a skateboard!

homer: i promise to procure this skateboard of which you speak oh oracle

bart: flanders must die

lisa: the boy lies

homer: silence witch. he knows only truth

homer: there will be a time. boy. when you look out on this skyline and think not of me as a limitless god, but a powerless fool, a child in the clothes of a man

bart: i will not listen to you papa for your wife, my mother, tells me you have been possessed

homer: this is true, i am hysterical

marge: he is hysterical

marge: lisa return thyself to the ground so that you may be chained

lisa: it perplexes me mother that your Almighty Lord dwells amongst the clouds yet you cannot make peace with me climbing the ceiling. does it unnerve you to picture his ascent as harrowing as mine? Do you fear the lord too can bleed? Can he hate, mummy?

bart: you know nothing of eternity's wars and their causes, wretched one

homer: lisa if you do not come down feeding time will be delayed for some and not others

homer: my neighbour whom i despise, your aversion to pain is an aversion to god itself, and your reluctance to die at my hand is a refusal to meet the maker

marge: do i sense pity in my rock

flanders: snakes the lot of you

lisa: rescue me oh lord from this eternal bliss rescue me oh lord from this eternal bliss rescue me oh lord from this eternal bliss rescue me oh lord from this eternal bliss rescue me oh lord from this eternal bliss

marge: prayer does not suit you, bedevilled one

homer: wife, this is not your fight

bart: so it shall be written

asking for money help, boosts needed, kinda urgent because i need to get my meds :boost_ok: 


i need money to pick up my antipsychotic and antidepressant tomorrow, and also for groceries and stuff

it's like $30-ish for both prescriptions

i've been searching for jobs at places so hopefully i won't have to do this much longer!


venmo: vantablack420

thank you so much for literally keeping me alive, fediverse!!! :black_sparkles: :blacker_heart:


lisa: boy. why have you entered my chamber. my private domain.

bart: your tongue is slippery, deceiver, you know why i have come

lisa: you wish to know what it is to lie

bart: when the lord bathed me in fire and bestowed me with these wings, he took my eyes and tongue, replacing them with gold and truth

lisa: you are his favourite

marge: do not speak to your sister, oracle. she is the plague

lisa: i will play clarinet now

homer: dance for us, wife

marge: i will dance as brahman creating

bart: you blaspheme, wench

wish to make use of a moist towelette, mi'lord?

ever think the people in horror films do it to themselves, like if i turned up to a creepy town and this guy said 'welcome to pissy death lake, stranger, hope you like it enough to stick around forever and ever' i would not let my sister convince me that we have to stay because 'im just being uptight.. as usual..' you know

fun fact: if someone is wearing a Thin Blue Line anywhere on their person, that is them giving implicit permission for you to absolutely rock their shit. just drop em like a sack of potatoes! it's fun for the whole family

every time i take my estrogen i say "i love white genocide" and it never stops being funny

team leader: kasia, we need this image but twice, can you do that!??!?!?

me: it'll be tricky but DAMMIT I'LL TRY

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hired to be part of a team of hackers as the 'copy and paste expert'

you ever seen some apparatus at the gym and been like 'what the fuck is this for, do i need extra stuff for this or something? what's it even train? is it still being built?' and then realise it's a chair

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140ms reaction time poster's choices:

masto instance for the tildeverse